Day 528

I knew that when his appetite started coming back it was probably the steroids. Now that he's been on them a couple weeks now I know for sure.

He's a hungry guy. Most of today's conversations seemed to revolve around food - how he's starving right after he eats, what food he'd like to have and even a specific list of foods to ask the dietician about. Then when it came time for him to go to dinner and me to leave for a bit (only patients and nurses are allowed in the dining room) I asked for his input on where I should go. He named off restaurant after restaurant. I followed one of his suggestions. The Ram.

Good choice. Not only did they have garlic fries but they had something called "ice cream cupcakes". Oh my! As tasty as everything was, I'm hoping I'm getting close to the end of the What I Ate When I Left the Hospital book.

I did put the car issue to rest. A morning spent at the dealership was time well spent. An oil change didn't find the rattling, but when they removed the tires for rotation they discovered a large rock in my brakes. Problem solved. If I hadn't solved it myself Gini had offered to pick me up - even pick up my car - to help me out. Thanks, Gini!

Day 527

If you need anything...

I hear that a lot these days. I certainly appreciate the offer, but how do you ask for help when you're accustomed to doing everything yourself? How do take help from other people you've never offered help to yourself?

How do I ask for stupid stuff? Things like needing someone to:

• carry off the broken exercise bike sitting out at the trash can.
• spray the weeds in the rose garden and the vegetable garden and the shade garden and in front of the house and behind the back fence.
• dig potatoes and pick tomatoes - and keep plenty of them for yourself.
• prune the roses - and take as many bouquets as you want. I'll even give you some vases for them.
• go through my mail. I get home and stack it in a pile(s). Sometimes I sort it, sometimes I don't. Either way I'm tired of catalogs, magazines, and credit card offers cluttering my space.
• take my car to get serviced. A terrible rattle appears to be coming from under the car and the maintenance required light that came on this week and won't go off is pressing me to take action. That is, whenever I can get there during business hours.
• wash and chop vegetables for me. I'm trying hard to keep juicing, but the washing and chopping cuts into either hospital time or getting-to-work time.
• clean out the irrigation pump filter. It's in a case in the ground, too low and screwed on too tight for me to clean it out. Sprinkler pressure is down and things aren't getting watered properly.
• dig up my daisies. They spread too much, they take too much deadheading, and they get too tall. They've taken over practically all my wildflower-turned-perennnial garden and I'm getting tired of having to stare at the ugly mess every time I pull into the driveway.
• pump my gas. In addition to driving back and forth to work I'm driving almost 80 miles roundtrip to the hospital several times a week and am using up gas like crazy.

How do I ask for help with those things? I don't. I say thanks for the offer and leave it at that. For a person who never asks for help maybe it's just easier to live with a messy house, messy gardens, barely-working sprinklers, a broken exercise bike, and intermittent juicing.

It was almost easier to live without a picture today, too. Of all the days I've taken pictures, all 526, today I believe was the hardest. Today was the day I couldn't find anything. In desperation I snapped a picture of a plant the high school staff gave my husband when he first wound up in the hospital. Both of us may not be flourishing right now but the plant is, some three weeks later.

Day 526

When one is beyond tired because of upheaval in her normal routine, what does one do? Go to work.

What does that person do when she gets home from work? Take a much needed nap.

What should that person do when she gets up from her nap?

Use her garden cucumbers to make dill pickles, of course.

Day 525

The wall made an appearance today and I hit it.

After three weeks of hospital back and forths, I hit the wall today. I woke up stiff, in pain, found it difficult to move, and had absolutely no energy. It was like a flashback to my bad arthritis days. I had been feeling pretty good for a while now, but that wall hit me hard today. And it wasn't a good day for it to happen.

Today was hubby's birthday. We made sure the nurses knew ahead of time so they could make him feel special until we arrived. They did. Even embarrassed him a bit by singing Happy Birthday to him in the dining room during lunch time. Daughter and I stayed home for a little while to finish his special cake. Because he is on a renal failure diet (low salt, low potassium, low protein) we had to make a cake without eggs. So I altered a recipe and made a chocolate zucchini cake with no eggs and no oil.

Cake + sign for his room + laptop + DVD was going to equal a fun night for him.

But things changed a bit. When we arrived at the hospital he wasn't feeling well and had even skipped his physical therapy. An extremely low blood pressure but an extremely high pulse rate was alarming to nurses and doctors. Our celebration was delayed by an EKG. Thank goodness no abnormalities appeared (other than a fast heart rate).

Dehydration.

All the medications to get the excess fluid out his system worked a little too well. The birthday celebration was delayed even more as four (or was it five?) different nurses tried to start an IV on a man who was too dehydrated for one to take. An even longer delay as they tried different things - they even wrapped his arm in warm blankets for a while to try and plump up the veins. The things I never knew!

Since the hospital provided a pudding sundae with his dinner we sang Happy Birthday and let him blow out the candle.

Later, once the IV was going strong, we ate just a bit of the zucchini cake (sent the rest to my mom) and watched some of the movie. Too long of a day for all of us.

 At least daughter still had some energy to take some sunset pictures on the way home.

Day 524

Today won't be an easy day for you, but it will definitely be a productive one! 

With a day's horoscope reading like that, I knew I was in for it.

Today was my first day back at work. A day I had to start addressing things I had put off. And a new discovery - unauthorized charges on my school credit card when hubby first got in the hospital. We have great folks at the district office helping resolve the issue.

Today was the day daughter came home to help out. She spent most of her time at her dad's school prepping his classroom for the school year. The school year he won't be starting, but will hopefully be finishing.

Today was the day we met with the kidney specialist. Kidneys are responding to treatment but with muscles not receiving protein for some time, a long road to recovery is ahead.

And a hot day. Getting in my car after the nephrologist visit confirmed just how hot it was. Once I got moving down the road, it did cool down to 107.

But an even more interesting picture was sent to me by someone I work with. She has some of the same health issues as I do but does a much better job of getting up and moving around than I do. She captured such a nice clear picture down by her pond.

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